What Is The Difference Between Gentlemen And Nice Guys?
Why do good males always failing to impress women? The reality is that these "nice" guys are acting in a way that screams, "I did something NICE for you, so what do I get out of it?"
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In the vast majority of cases, they'll just get a one-way trip to the dreaded FRIEND ZONE. If you're unfamiliar with this term, it refers to a particular circle of hell intended for guys who believe that sucking up to a girl would get them laid.
In actuality, this kind of niceness is a guise for a false sense of ENTITLEMENT.
But don't get me wrong: being a gentleman is admirable. There isn't anything wrong with it.
doing all the traditional things, such as giving up your train seat for someone in need, such as an elderly person or a pregnant woman.
Being a gentleman entails more than merely doing things for attractive women in the hopes of being laid. No, it's actually being good to everyone out of a true sense of charity, with no expectation of anything in return.
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When it comes to dating and relationships, some men make the mistake of believing that providing material fulfilment will get them a date. This attitude will simply diminish your social value and make you appear to be a beta male.
This is primarily due to the fact that it allows little opportunity for momentum. When you come in with firearms, it's a different storey.
It tells a lady you're willing to go crazy with just about anyone if you're flaming for someone you don't even know - and that's not attractive at all.
As a result, the poor girl is driven into a corner, with just two options:
- She'll milk the guy and then leave him for dead.
- She'll send him to the Friend Zone for the rest of his life.
Men who act like decent guys are frequently afflicted by a severe lack of self-assurance. They'll go the nice guy method because they're afraid they won't be able to get into a girl's good graces any other way.
Let me tell you something, my friend: there are far more effective methods to win a woman's heart than acting like a dependent puppy. She may think you attractive, but after the novelty wears off, she'll drop you like a hot potato.
Focus on being the entertaining man with a wonderful sense of humour instead than relying on EXTERNAL aspects to attract her (i.e. doing things for her or giving her items). Teasing her and making jokes that hint at your love agenda will help you generate tension.
Prior to bringing out the mushy stuff like candlelight meals and the chocolates/flowers combo, get all of that out of the way first. While being generous with those things has its place in relationships, it is not at the start.
Don't be stingy with your sweetness; spread it out gradually. Too much, too fast will turn her off, and she'll think of you as just another "nice guy" rather than an Honest-To-God Gentleman.
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Allow the attraction to reach critical mass before delivering the killing blow. It's not a race to the finish line when it comes to courtship; it's all about doing it in stages.
In the end, being the guy who pays for dates (within reason), walks his girl on the beach, and rubs her feet after a long day at work is a lovely feeling. Just keep in mind that this should only be done under two circumstances:
- You're a couple, more or less.
– You're doing it in a RECIPROCAL environment.
Otherwise, you risk losing your EQUAL status, which equals less attractiveness.
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So remember: recognising the difference between a high-value guy who does things for other people (i.e. not just the ladies) because he honestly wants to and a low-value guy who does things for other people (i.e. not just the ladies) because he truly wants to is key to getting a woman to like you.
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...and the sentimental schmuck with his heart on his sleeve who believes that doing nice things for a female is the ONLY way to keep a relationship stable.
